The Worst Film Fathers we Actually Like

With Father’s Day coming up this weekend, I wanted to pay tribute to Dad’s everywhere. Instead of the obligatory “rank the best Fathers captured on film” (which is a no contest… Atticus Finch wins everytime), I’m gonna do something a little different to help Dad’s everywhere feel better about themselves. Even if you’re not a bastion of fatherhood, you’re probably better than these guys whom people all over the world idolize from the big screen. These are the 7 worst Fathers that are still likeable characters ever captured on film, in no particular order:

Homer Simpson (The Simpsons Movie)- Homer’s not just a terrible father, he’s an awful human being to boot. Nobody has committed more utterly contemptable acts as a dad, husband and employee than Homer J. Yet he somehow remains one of the most popular TV characters ever. Being animated covers many sins, but so does the fact he represents the worst of us all in the funniest way possible.

Henry Jones (Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade)- Everyone was incredibly disappointed not to see the elder Jones in “The Crystal Skull”, since his turn in the Last Crusade was so memorable (and he appears in Frank Darabont’s leaked script). But while he was certainly an excellent comic foil in his son’s adventures, he was a bad Father to the fedora’d explorer. He was critical, absent and totally obsessed with his work, a trait Indiana embraced along with his pop’s profession. In fact, you could argue Indiana Jones’ drive to make history is bred from his insecurity about measuring up to his larger-than-life namesake… an onus no son should bear.

Mac McGuff (Juno)- The quirky, hipster, evolutionary Dawson’s Creek-esque dialogue spouted by its lead teenagers made this movie a hit but JK Simmons’ portrayal as Juno’s absent and apathetic father, Mac, stood out. It’s not entirely his fault that his daughter got pregnant but he never seemed to cared even afterward. Except to offer advice upon occasion, he essentially has zero investment in Juno’s life. The saddest part is that the movie implies it didn’t always be that way.

Benjamin Martin (The Patriot) - Mel Gibson playing a flawed father in one of his films happens quite often, but not nearly as often as his wife dead [check out IMDB to refesh your memory on that one]. The best example is the Patriot, where he ends up with two dead sons, a daughter that hates him and a shotgun wedding to his sister-in-law. His perpetual “Am I pacifist or a war machine?” bipolarity is to blame and doesn’t make him a particularly good dad to his litter of children, who will likely grow to resent him and hold him responsible for the atrocities they experienced.

George McFly (Back to the Future) - The oddly intriguing performance by Crispin Glover (are there any other kind of Crispin Glover performances?) as the teenage George McFly was what everyone remembers, but don’t forget the modern day portion of the movie. In the real 1985, George is the perpetual loser, sad-sack father you’d expect to see from William H Macy, Phillip Seymour Hoffman or another early 90’s indie favorite. It’s safe to say Marty’s home life wasn’t so great, due in part to his pathetic Dad. While his trip back in time may have reversed his Father’s fortunes, the fact ol’ George needed the intervention of his time-traveling son to make him a better Dad truly stands out.

John McClane (Die Hard)- McClane is the badass, real-life Homer Simpson equivalent in the action adventure genre. Not only is he a bad husband and overall insufferable human being, he also executes poorly on his ill-conceived plans. However, he always ends up smelling like roses in the end. The worst offense for Mr. McClane is his poor excuse for parenting. We don’t see any interaction with his children in any of the first three movies (the only ones that count), or any concern for the fruit of his loins. Being a cop is difficult and time-consuming, being a cop almost constantly plagued by terrorists even more so, but spend a little time with the kids John.

Chester Lee (Ladybugs)- So, technically he was a future stepdad and wasn’t particularly well-liked, but Rodney Dangerfield’s character in this early 90’s sports movie needed to make the list. In a “light-hearted” family type of comedy, he may actually be the worst father figure on the list. Convincing your future stepson to cross-dress in his already confusing teenage years, just so the youth soccer team you’re coaching only to get a promotion at work could dominate is about as low as it gets. Then you throw in the pedophilic overtones (his name is Chester for crying out loud) and the most uncomfortable dressing room scene this side of Bad Santa to go on top of Dangerfield’s inherent creepiness and you have yourself a genuinely disturbing character.