Seacrest To Be Paid $15 Million To Do Nothing

by ThaneEconomou

Ryan Seacrest is to be the highest paid TV personality, whatever that may be, with $15 million dollars a year for his American Idol hosting duties, whatever that may be.

Seacrest is now officially, according to Forbes, the highest paid non-working non-entertaining entertainer since Carson Daly was paid $9 million to stay up and pretend he had a late night talk show.

“This is beyond my wildest dreams,” said Seacrest in a press conference earlier today. “When I was younger, I would say I didn’t want to do anything when I grew up. And now that dream has come true. And paid off generously.”

And while Seacrest will be making $15 million a year, his former Idol co-host Brian Dunkleman has also received a raise, to $15 an hour as a manager at Starbucks.

Seacrest’s numerous duties on Idol including standing up, holding a microphone, reading off cue cards, waxing Simon Cowell’s ass, and driving Paula’s short bus to and from work.

In addition to Idol, Seacrest’s resume includes being a producer on Keeping Up With the Kardashians, Bromance, and Denise Richards: It’s Complicated. Seacrest has often commented how hard it is to keep destroying television. Seacrest additionally receives tens of millions of dollars a year for radio shows, E! hosting jobs, Bar Mitzvahs, and standing around Rupert Murdoch’s home as a modern art piece.

After the announcement of Seacrest’s salary of $15 million a year, MTV.com stated “he earned it.

They seriously did.

Please Note: The above picture is of Ryan Seacrest in the closet.