The Jonas Brothers Are At It Again

by Kris Hanson

For those of us that enjoy a nice dose of comedy on lethargic Mondays, the Jonas Brothers have delivered us a nice package of guffaws via MTV. They claim that their new album will feature songs about ex-girlfriends. The album–entitled Lines, Vines and Trying Times–features a duet with Miley Cyrus and a heart-wrenching breakup song about Taylor Swift. In regards to fans getting an intimate look into their personal lives, young Joe says:

I think that will happen until we’re 60 years old.

Besides that fact that a mop with a Taylor Swift photo taped to it does not constitute a romantic relationship… forty more years? I have to wake up for the rest of my natural life hearing about the Jonas Brothers? My god! I thought the average lifespan of a moppit was five years. I don’t know how I can handle four more decades of avoiding popular TV and radio.

It looks like my only choice is to become an adventurous, urban sewer-dweller! At least down there I won’t have to witness things like this: