http://thezaz.nationallampoon.com Funny Celebrity Gossip & Entertainment News Fri, 20 Nov 2009 22:58:59 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en (Re-posting in honor of New Moon coming out today) Robert Pattinson creeps me the hell out. I haven't even seen his vampire movie. All I know him as is the kid who died in the Goblet of Fire and the guy who takes creepy photos. Look at the ... http://thezaz.nationallampoon.com/articles/just-coming-right-out-and-saying-it-twilight-kid-creeps-me-out-the-repost/ Sing, goddess, the anger of Mad’s son Michael And its devastation, which put pain thousandfold upon Zaller and his Zaz. What was it then set them together in bitter collision? The sad sombrero, or the menacing moustache—marauding in guise of greater guile? Strike up in your mind’s eye, noble Madsen Just how you’ve made alien your most ... http://thezaz.nationallampoon.com/articles/an-ode-to-michael-madsen/ Michael Madsen has a new film out called HIRED GUN (Directed by Brad Jurjens). And when he agreed to sit down for an "offbeat" interview with me, I don't think he realized that I was going to be joking around, trying to get a reaction out of him. In a ... http://thezaz.nationallampoon.com/videos/i-accidentally-called-michael-madsen-a-retard-on-camera/ Picturing Senator Byrd surfing...  nude. Happy Birthday and thanks for helping to warn Boston about the Brits. *** I give good beak. http://thezaz.nationallampoon.com/videos/byrd-is-the-word/ John Cusack, Amanda Peet, Chiwetel Ejiofor, and Director Roland Emmerich participate in an open and candid forum about the potential end of the world, and their new film 2012. The meandering of the forum ushered in topics such as Vicodin, dehydrated food pills, Elephants, The Queen of England, boxes of ... http://thezaz.nationallampoon.com/uncategorized/2012-the-almost-end-of-the-world-interviews/ There are drunk people playing a synthesizer in the other room and it sounds like someone scrambling a metal device around in my brain. The keyboard goes from a generic, midi-format polka to what could only be described as ambient sound-noodling. (Ok, so, in reality, I can come up with ... http://thezaz.nationallampoon.com/articles/various-painful-things-being-compared-to-hearing-loud-music-while-i-try-to-sleep/ Always know your predators. Bald. Mustache. Texan. Uneducated, yet still called a doctor. http://thezaz.nationallampoon.com/articles/good-advice/ Things turn sour for this guy (well, they started sour when he brought the guitar onstage) and he...reacts. Some would say 'over.' Best line is the very end, as to whether his actions were necessary. Hey, crazy guy with the guitar: there's only one master. http://thezaz.nationallampoon.com/articles/how-to-deal-with-a-heckler/ By: Eddie "Cube" Rawls (Via BuzzFeed) Finally, a preacher brave enough to tackle a problem cursing the body politic, our moral fabric, President Obama, and indeed, urinals caked on walls across the universe... peeing sitting down. Reports are already leaking that Sarah Palin is set to stand up and agree on Facebook. *** Follow me ... http://thezaz.nationallampoon.com/uncategorized/the-president-of-the-united-states-probably-pees-sitting-down/ Hundreds of fans stormed out of a Britney Spears performance in Perth, Australia, angered that the popstar was lip-syncing. In other news, LA Kings fans left the Staples Center because it was too cold. http://thezaz.nationallampoon.com/articles/shock-and-awe/