Hacked or Cracked? Rick Sanchez’s Twitter account was hacked this morning and he texted in sick.

Who is the hacker? Artie Lange?

video.vh1.comAttention Free Radio Fans, I had a quick whisper with the talent/writers/producers of Free Radio and do they have a season lined up that you won’t belive.

I can’t tell you who, but I can tell you this. Three of the confirmed guests are on my OhMyGawdThey’reSoFuckingHawt list.

Can you guess who?

One is on a hit network show and he has network hair and fills out a suit nicely. He’s on the tip of your tongue…

Another was married to her, oh yeah, and he’s been working on an album with another friend of mine, he’s a little nutty but in the most delightfully sexy way, he’s tall, handsome… and I’m not telling who he is.

The third one is a confirmed genius with a touch of dirty boy. I’m going to pull every string I’ve ever strung to get myself to the studio that day so I can drool watch…

Guesses? Anyone? I’ll reveal when they’re in the can. I promise you Free Radio is planning a season you won’t forget.

You can watch the entire first season here.

Do you think TomKat would like this on their tree?

For more last minute decorating tips check out Tampon Crafts.

Gawker readers are talking about my vagina.

The Mommies hate me and Motrin has apologized.

Can we just move on and talk about more important things?

Like how to spell my last name?

Jessica Gottlieb is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles

Hat tip to Motherhood Uncensored for the video

As we bid farewell to my youth, vim and vigor.

Shortly I will be taking my two children, aged 7 and 10 to the famed Roxy Theatre on the Sunset Strip. In a few humiliating hours I will become one of a handful of mothers who take their tweens to a fully interactive private concert with the Jonas Brothers.

I’d like to thank American Eagle for providing me them with this wonderful opportunity.

The mommy checklist includes:

Hair mascara for my grey roots
Mom Jeans
A minivan to valet park
Crocs (cuz, ya know my feet get tired)
Various snacks in my very large purse
Motorola cell phones/walkie talkies so I can communicate with the kids as they walk around the room
A cotton/poly blend shirt so there won’t be any seat belt wrinkles on it.

Oh heaven help me, how the mighty have fallen, and by mighty, I mean my boobs.

Jessica Gottlieb is a freelance writer in Los Angeles.

As a satirist I couldn’t hope for two better dressed women.

Four years of this should be fun. I’m sure that Mr. Blackwell is spinning like a rotisserie.

You may not appreciate the full hideosity of said ladies’ outfits but I assure you that Ms. Bidens suit made me rue the day I got HDTV and I’ve been told the lady has a neck, maybe we’ll see it one day. Or perhaps her head will continue to bobble precariously above overpirced suits dyed in colors that I can only hope do not exist in nature.

And Ms. Obama? Darlin, I can’t even begin to talk about that dress. I notice that you aren’t wearing pantyhose and your legs are the reason we all go to the gym (perfection my dear), but whatever persuaded you to wrap that thing around your waist? The whole getup resembles an apron splattered arcross the front of the hottest body to rock the White House since before I was born.

So yeah, does this administration excite me? Hell yes! But you know who’s gonna have a field day, don’t you? Go Fug Yourself.

Jessica Gottlieb is a freelance writer in Los Angeles, she can be found writing at JessicaGottlieb.com