Tea Party favorite Herman Cain has, so far, been the surprise star of the first lap of the 2012 GOP race to the White House. Despite a lack of government experience and general understanding of facts,  the former CEO of Godfather’s Pizza has exhibited a more comprehensive economic plan than Michele Bachmann , less stuttering than Rick Perry, and more charisma than Mitt Romney. Despite those obvious advantages, Cain has yet to come up with a catchy campaign slogan for the public to rally behind. The astute political campaign advisors …

At the Iowa straw poll, which sounds like a way for the Amish to pick who’s going to drive the lead buggy, The Minnesotan Mother of Mayhem Michele Bachmann narrowly beat out the Texas Toker Ron Paul.

With the impending eminent government shutdown, aside for essential employees, everyone else is on non-payed furlough. This has many people wondering, ‘Am I essential?” Boil that question down, and basically we are asked, ‘Do I matter?”
Our crack investigative team has acquired a memo being circulated by the administration to give government employees a preview into their decision making process as to who is considered “essential” and who isn’t:
 

From The Office of The President of The United States of America:
My fellow citizens and government employees. In this time of economic …

Michael Steele’s tenure as the 63rd (and first African-American) Chairman of the Republican National Committee has been plagued by a comedy of errors. The RNC leader has made various laughable attempts to Hip-Hopify the Grand Ol’ Party of White Guys, by speaking slangily and carrying a boom box. A recent scandal involving the spending of an exorbitant amount of money at an LA bondage club is just the latest in a string of major and minor faux-pas that have put the former Lieutenant Governor of Maryland on the GOP hot …

Sometimes, you just have to accept these things as the truth.

Actor Jon Voight decided to take a minute off from acting to be the Master of Ceremony at a Republican fundraiser where he decided to share his opinion.  A mistake many actors make — we don’t care to hear your opinion on important issues.  He declared the U.S. “a weak nation,” calling Obama a “false prophet,” and saying Republicans need to free us from “this Obama oppression.” And he wonders why Angelina Jolie doesn’t want to see him.
Does she even know who he is, anymore? I bet she doesn’t …